I really struggled with this post. I struggled with whether to even write it. I struggled with the title. So, here goes.
Awake.
Haunted.
Angels.
All of these describe my nights, as of late. I cannot get Tuesday or her family out of my mind. Why has this story stuck in me so deeply? I dream of her. I dream of her siblings and her mother. I picture talking to others about her. I wake from dreams of her and lay in bed for half an hour trying to get her out of my mind. I've almost stopped crying about her. This is only because of the abundance of posts I've researched about her. I almost wish I'd never read about her. But, there has to be a reason that she's at the front of my waking and unconscious mind. WHAT IS IT? WHY? Her mom wrote a beautiful post about a good sign after her life celebration. I finally smiled about it. The slide show done in September by their photographer makes me happy for those moments shared and treasured for their family. The outpouring of love shown by her mom's blogger-world/twin-mommy friends is unbelievable. She is at rest. She is no longer in pain. She is watching over her twin sister and family. She is with our Blessed Jesus. and yet... still I dream.
1 comment:
maybe the Lord is trying to impress something upon you. or move you to do something. or maybe you are another mom who is bearing part of the burden -- being let in to a little bit of the pain -- for a mom who is going through such a terrible loss. i believe the Lord has us mourn for each other. even for those we don't know. whatever the reason for your heart for tuesday and her family, keep us posted. God might be up to something cool. He does like to use even tragedy for His great glory.
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