Here's your sign!

Why is it...despite my overly LARGE midsection...that a hostess, tonight, actually asked, "Smoking or non?"

I respond with, "Uh, definitely NON."

She says, "Oh! Are you pregnant?"

Nope, just don't feel like exposing this watermelon seed to second hand cancer sticks.

Nope, I'm trying to smuggle in a beach ball that might explode if it comes in contact with smoke.

Nope, I am hiding my husband in my shirt, 'cause he likes to play hide and seek with strangers.

Nope, I drank too much beer and have a huge gut now.

Nope, my butt is now in both front AND back...here's your sign.

:0}